How to explain your kid’s sensory needs to family and friends?

It is not too complicated to explain sensory integration deficits to those who have never encountered this term before. But still, reactions of some people, especially those from an older generation, are quite interesting. They range from “But look at those cheeks, he looks so healthy!” to “You could not get away with this kind of behavior in my time.” Have you ever heard comments like that? So, what to do, how to explain to people that child who is throwing a tantrum over a glass of orange juice does not deserve punishment?

To answer this question, take into consideration that most of us have some sensory deficits and that we don’t even realize that some of our every day reactions are actually sensory reactions to the outside stimuli.

  • When sitting on a chair with one leg crossing over the other leg, some people start bouncing the upper leg. The brain did not have enough information about the position of the upper leg and had to move it around (or if you have some loose shoes, some people tend to play around with it). In this way, bouncing of the leg gives proprioceptive input from the joints to the brain about the leg and its position.
  • Some people find it very painful to walk on the pebbles, they have tactile hyper-sensitivity in the area of their feet.
  • Some people don’t like to touch wet sponges or wet hair.
  • You may throw some people off their balance very easily.
  • Some people will rarely manage to hit the shuttlecock as their hand – eye coordination is distorted.
  • When tired, some people become very sensitive to sounds or light (me!)

However, some of the kids and most of the healthy adults still manage to compensate these discrepancies on a cognitive level. We know dishes have to be washed or we have to sit through a boring class and while it won’t be the most pleasurable activity, we will still do it. Kids who have more severe sensory deficits will not be able to do that. They will only be seeking the needed stimuli or trying to avoid the stimuli they are overly sensitive to. What do you do when you get out of the house in summer – you cover your eyes or squint for a bit until you adjust. So, when you see a child throwing a tantrum over a glass of orange juice, check why that is happening (hint: pulp / temperature / sourness).

Thus, when you see that somebody does not understand when you tell them about your child’s sensory needs and behavior, try asking them some of these questions: do you bounce your leg after sitting with one leg over the other; do you mind the loud noises in the evenings; do you mind the mix of smells in the shopping malls; is the sun too bright for you when you come out of the dark room…They will feel much closer to the topic when they see that sensory integration is something within themselves, too but were never aware of it. They will comprehend the issue and its intensity / severity much easier.
Let me know if this was helpful!